5 Mini Film Reviews!

I've watched a lot of films recently, but instead of doing a separate review for each (I don't have the time and I'm #lazy) I thought I'd do a collection of mini reviews. Like, really mini.

Hope you enjoy reading :)

Cast: Amanda Seyfried / Gary Oldman / Max Irons / Lukas Haas
Director: Catherine Hardwicke.
Content Rating/Advisory: PG 13 for violence, creature terror, and some sexuality.

Set in a medieval village that is haunted by a werewolf, a young girl falls for an orphaned woodcutter, much to her family's displeasure.

Dear aspiring filmmakers, aspiring directors, aspiring actors and actresses, aspiring writers, aspiring producers......
Let me present to you the movie that perfectly demonstrates what not to do when you make a movie.
Here are some tips on how this film could've been improved (like, if they ever do a remake BUT PLEASE SWEET MOTHER NO).

- Good looking male heroes are useful, but they need to be able to act. Brooding and showing your bare chest ain't acting, nor is switching out of character mid-scene.
- Write a good story - one with a plausible plot. Maybe even make the characters three dimensional? Some character depth goes a long way. Or maybe don't have the heroine - that's the lead character - be controlled by the males in her life.
- Write strong dialogue. Cheesiness, cliches, and talking when there shouldn't be talking (a.k.a pointless blabber) is annoying and pathetic. Even if you do have bad dialogue, at least get good actors so they can work on it.
- Don't make it so cheesy and stupid that your viewers burst out laughing during a tragic onscreen death (*cough, cough* I might have, uh, you know...). Kill the melodrama, kill the slow-motion, get good actors - you might make an audience member shed a tear.

This movie was a hundred times worse than Twilight. Even the talent of Seyfried couldn't save it. And believe me, you'll hate everything so much you'll be begging Wolfie to just get on with the killing.

GONE GIRL - 2014
Cast: Rosamund Pike / Ben Affleck / Neil Patrick Harris /
Director: David Fincher.
Content Rating/Advisory: R for strong language, strong violence and gore, and strong nudity and sexual content.  

With his wife's disappearance having become the focus of an intense media circus, a man sees the spotlight turned on him when it's suspected that he may not be innocent.

The book was good. I didn't love it, but I really liked it. And I thoroughly enjoyed the movie too. 

Excellent cinematography, powerful, witty dialogue, haunting and elegantly atmospheric, and superbly written, it''s a brilliant movie - sharp, terrifying, intense, but also sublime. And deliciously clever

The acting's brilliant too. Pike is darkly ethereal as Amy - horrifying one minute then breathtaking the next - and Affleck is equally perfect in the role of Nick. The secondary cast and characters are also strong. 

The only thing I wasn't sure about was the ending. It was realistically open-ended, but I still wanted more closure. I wanted Amy to face justice.

Incredibly thrilling and perceptive, this movie is excellent. Perhaps even better than the book, but I now need to do a reread...


Cast: Benedict CumberbatchMartin Freeman / Mark Gatiss / Amanda Abbington  
Director: Douglas Mackinnon. 
Content Rating/Advisory: PG 13 for threat, violence, and some disturbing content.

Sherlock and Watson travel back to Victorian England, solving the case of the Abomnable Bride.

I'm a huge Sherlock fan, but I was disappointed with this movie

On the positive side, it's stunningly shot, gorgeously atmospheric, and the humour is absolute gold. But I felt like the acting suffered - Cumberbatch, especially, was not on top form - and the plot was confusing. The time jumps were baffling, and it was hard to suspend disbelief. 

It's a good movie, but not an amazing one. It suffices as a solid, purely fun film, but at a closer glance it doesn't hold up to scrutiny. 


Cast: Kate Winslet / Jude Law / Gwyneth Paltrow / Matt Damon / Laurence Fishburne 
Director: Steven Soderbergh.  
Content Rating/Advisory: PG 13 for some disturbing content and language.  

Healthcare professionals, government officials and everyday people find themselves in the midst of a worldwide epidemic as the CDC works to find a cure.

I watched this film for the cast. That was literally my only reason, but I was still expecting a good movie - generally good movies attract good casts.

My likes: good cinematography, strong claustrophobic feel that suits the story, brilliant scenography, attention to set detail, and a cast that shone admist the weakness of the script

But the movie was still bad. It was so infuriatingly boring, slow, tedious, and despite good dialogue, the script bounced all over the place in a messy jumble - it was as if the writers couldn't decide where to head next.

The amazing A-list cast was wasted. Characters died off all over the place so you never got the chance to properly get to know them, and character arcs never came full-circle.

It's called an action thriller, but with a cast that don't get to fulfill their potential and a plot that wavers along, this film is, instead, disappointing and lifeless. 

Cast: Zac Efron / Taylor Schilling / Blythe Danner 
Director: Scott Hicks. 
Content Rating/Advisory: PG 13 for some violence, and strong sexuality. 

A Marine travels to Louisiana after serving three tours in Iraq and searches for the unknown woman he believes was his good luck charm during the war.

I am not a big Nicholas Sparks fan. In fact, I'd hardly call myself a fan if it wasn't for my passionate adoration of The Notebook film. Out of all Sparks' movies, my favourites will always be the films of Safe Haven and The Notebook

This movie did not work for me. I guess it's good as what it is - an extremely Sparkified romance - but even then I found it hard to look past that. The sugar-coated, predictable story, the too-perfect characters, the all-white cast, the cliche dialogue, the contrived acting....it's all terrible. On the positive side, the film is beautifully shot. But that's as far as my likes go. 

If you're a die-hard Sparks fan, you might enjoy this film. But I'd recommend The Notebook or Safe Haven if you want a good story, a good film, as well as a good romance. 


Have you watched any of these films? What did you think of them? Chat with me! 

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